when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
sorry didn’t mean to call you, i was just trying to put the t-rex emoji beside your name
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
Randomize
