You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
You know you have crossed to the dark side of marriage when a nap is more important than jacking off
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
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