I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
Dude, for your own safety, do not bring that chick home. I'm pretty sure you're going to find a marsupial pouch smuggling a fresh batch of herpes under that hoodie. Bail bail bail bail bail.
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
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