perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
Randomize