That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
there was a trapeze. enough said
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
On Tinder, guy asked me if I had ever been fucked by a Pokemon master. Needless to say I didn't respond.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
You left your phone here
Wait...
Randomize
