evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
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