? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
Randomize
