my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
only you would photoshop your dick
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
Randomize
