this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
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