My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
