I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
A milkman. But instead of milk I'm delivering marijuana. And instead of a milk truck it's an armored car.
You're a weed delivery man, in an armored car?
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
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