talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
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