Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
Come share oat with me in your robe
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
Randomize