All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
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