I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
This spray tan I used isn't working out. I spent an hour exfoliating and rubbing the damn stuff in with rubber gloves. I wanted the alluring, sun-kissed, sexy look. I've achieved smelling like burnt popcorn and the cats won't stop licking me. I'm a salt lick for cats.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
Randomize
