So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
It's really life affirming to be at a wedding thinking wow I took your husbands virginity
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
Randomize
