Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
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