i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
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