marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
Don't tell me you're on acid again
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
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