i just woke up i smell like fire, i have bruises on both knees and one elbow, i have a lighter and nip of smirnoff blueberry in my bed, rug burn on one hip and about 12 pics of you and me on my camera-this needs to stop happening
yea ive got to shower which is going to be painful given the skin burns from the blowup obstacle course races last night
I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
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