i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
So what's it like to be pregnant?
It feels like I'm hungover and when I was drunk I was kicked off a mechanical bull and then trampled.
Heard flapping noises behind me. It was my roommate flapping her bathrobe like wings, saying "I'm a faaaiiiiry."
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
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