Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
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