i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
I've got a tequila scented hand sanitizer for you.
you're the best roommate i could ever have.
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
