Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
you left a note on your car that said " please dont tow, im to drunk to drive. safety first!"
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
Randomize
