whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Threw my underwear in my purse as I was running away after sex last night, went to pick up my birth control prescription this morning, took out my wallet and accidentally flung my sweet thong onto the counter in front of the cashier. Think that was the universes way of telling me I am a whore.
I knew I had to get an abortion when his toddler sister came up to hug my leg and I kicked her off saying, "Get off, fucker."
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
Randomize
