well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
God, you're amazing. I just want to hang out with you in the nude and watch Monty Python movies whilst we quip about how comedians just aren't as funny anymore.
Credit for originality. Points off for a mild to moderate creepy factor.
I just conveyed my whole sex life to my mom over voicemail. Anddd, I'm hammered.
Top night. Top night.
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize
