i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
You just sent a mass text asking if anyone ever drank the blood of a goat in the glorious name of Satan...after that we confiscated any writing utensil
Randomize
