ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
I made friends with a raccoon. I pet it. Like I was Pocahontas.
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
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