She's making her own pesto again. Cooking spaghetti in the microwave and "frying" vegetables in the toaster oven. All this while wearing the yellow rubber gloves and saying that the pesto has feelings like a real person. Im terrified.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
