Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
I yelled at your uterus for you.
Dude I can't beleive you didn't wake up. I literally f'd her IN THE DISHWASHER. Btw I'm pretty sure I also kinda broke the dishwasher.
Randomize
