My balls are so social today.
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
Randomize
