yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
it seems as if every mistake i've ever made in life i've had an errection in one hand and a bud light in the other
I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
My ex is stopping by while he’s working tonight after delivering a pizza to fuck me, then going back to work at Pizza Hut. This is what my life has become.
Randomize
