Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
Woke up with a retainer in my boxers and about ten chicks passed out around me. now I feel like something out of Cinderella, trying to find whose teeth fit in the glass retainer.
I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
We don't watch enough power rangers
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
Ever try to swallow something and have it go up into your nose instead? Yeah, I just sneezed bacon.
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
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