I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
