She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
Randomize
