Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
Randomize
