i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
I want to celebrate with you...
There's nothing I'd like more than a celebratory "The guy I'm doing just found out he's not a baby daddy" dinner.
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
Real life skills section of my resume: blow jobs, food knowledge trivia, sarcasm, mascaera application, sexting, tolerance of rail liquors
Randomize
