love makes seman taste better
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
Randomize
