And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
who knew "i drink your milkshake" would work as a pickup line
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
Just got hit on by a 28-year old, quadraplegic, triple-cancer-survivor redneck. Now updating bucket list to meet newfound standards.
Randomize