You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
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