I am puke
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
Last time Jon threw a party I woke up on my porch, no shirt but 4 bras on, and "make better life choices" written on my stomach in sharpie
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
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