Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
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