i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
I asked my boss to leave early for a booty call. She said yes. See.... everyone sees it's important I get laid.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
When are your genitals available?
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
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