yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
I just accidently deleted 60 gigs of porn from my external hard drive. Thats over 300 pornos! I think im gonna cry.
Im surprised that you are even able to text me right now.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
Randomize
