seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
Randomize
