My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
Randomize
