Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
Randomize
