Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Randomize
