it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
Sooo, my mother is snoring, my ex is sexting me, the guy I'm having an affair with is sending me dick pics, and all I want to do is sleep!
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
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