and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
Used my phone to vibrate 'eye of the tiger'. It's like Rocky is punching my nuts, but gently.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
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