I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
As if me making pizza in a skillet wasn't enough proof that I was in no state to be cooking, this burn blister on my hand is
Your first words after putting out the flames, "how am I supposed to eat girls out with my top lip burned off??"
Yeah no more flaming everclear shots.
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
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