so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
I don't know. I just have an affinity for nudity when I'm drunk.
How the hell am I supposed to tell that to a group of eight year olds?! It was three in the afternoon for fucks sake!
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
Randomize
